Let’s not: Compare Ourselves to Others

We don’t have the time to play with it today, so I’m just gon’ have to dive in.

compare-verb| estimate, measure, or note the similarity or dissimilarity between.

Testimony:

For years, ya’ll, years…I found myself often comparing myself to my friends, people who weren’t my friends, people I knew, people I didn’t know. Social media was at one point the worst thing in my life because it is a portal into everybody’s business. It wasn’t good for me because it only created another avenue for me to be nosey, snoop, and compare myself to others. I would compare the amount of attention other women would get in comparison to myself. I would compare the success of others to myself. I would compare my body type, and face type, and hair type, and other minuscule things that do not actually matter. I even tried to do the things someone else was doing because their life “seemed” better than mine.

So why was I acting like this? Well one, I often found myself comparing because I did not love myself. I did not appreciate the blessings and unique traits I had, so it was easy for my mind to wonder into comparisons. Ironically, comparing myself deepened my lack of self-love because seeing others just reminded me of what I did not have. Not only was my self-esteem non -existent but also I was looking at my glass half empty while looking at  other people’s glasses hoping to get a taste. However, I did not realize I had the juice the whole time.

Break it Down, B:

When we compare ourselves to others, we set ourselves up for failure every single time. Whole self-love or otherwise, we are setting ourselves up for hurt feelings and sorrow every time we think about what someone else has that we do not. The problem with comparing ourselves to others is, however, ONE: We do not know what the other person has gone through or is going through in order to obtain what they have. For example, sure that couple looks happy, but what you didn’t know was that bruh beats ole girl ass, or is verbally abusive. What you don’t know is the couple went through years of relationship trial and error and finally got it right. Sure that one chick looks very glamorous and successful, but what you didn’t know was that she is actually miserable when no one is around, or sadly mourns the passing of her mother. TWO: Comparing  leads to envy and imitation. Imitation is suicide to your own gifts and talents. Mind you, the world needs you to be be YOU. Remember that special purpose we discussed before? You can’t be you if you are trying to be someone else because you are jealous. AND, we all know envy and jealousy is one of fears little baby demons, and we don’t need that negativity in our lives. Jealous folks put me on edge because there is no telling what they will do or how they will manipulate to make themselves feel better. Don’t be a that person. THREE: We miss out on the beauty of what we already have. I think it pisses God off a little bit too. S/he probably looks at us thinking “ungrateful ass: I bless you will all that you have and you go and worry about what I someone else has. Tisk Tisk Tisk. You get coal for my son’s birthday.”Seriously though, God wants us to be proud of what we have.(Galatians 6: 4-5)

YOU have that special juice in ya glass that no one else has, so there is no reason to compare. God made us all fearfully and wonderfully(Psalm 139:14). Meaning, God made us all with the upmost intentionality. There’s nothing to compare when you are already amazingly and wonderfully crafted by an exceedingly awesome entity. Embrace the fact can’t nobody do what you do. Can’t nobody: laugh like you, talk like you, walk like you, twerk like you,  Milly Rock like you, throw hands like you, think like you, or illuminate like you. Once you accept the fact you da shit, and the only lump of excrement like yourself, the comparisons dissipate.

Facts:

  1. You are the Sugar, the Honey, the Ice, and the Tea.
  2. God made you the way you are intentionally.
  3. Comparing yourself to others is a waste of time.

Pay Homage:

“Envy is ignorance. Imitation is suicide. We must learn to take ourselves for better or for worse.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Say: I’m the pooh, the whole pooh, and nothing but the pooh & can’t nobody do what I do.

Salute:  Love you. Love yours.

be light. Work your talents. together we can spark a light pandemic.

peace,

Bird Nefertiti

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One thought on “Let’s not: Compare Ourselves to Others

  1. charandtheweb says:

    AMEN to all of this! Once I stopped doing this, and let me tell you, it’s like a weight being lifted off your shoulders. Like many, I too struggled with the way in which I saw myself, and I feel like those outside influences don’t do much to help with that. At some point I asked myself, ‘What’s so wrong with being you. Just you?’ and the answer was “nothing”. Instead, I have started to appreciate what I do have instead of focusing on the things I don’t. Fantastic and inspiring post. You’ve got a lovely blog.

    Would you be interested in writing/sharing a couple of articles regarding issues such as life, identity and self-awareness on Creators.co? I’d love to see more if this kind of content on the platform as we continue to branch out. Feel free to shoot me an e-mail for more information. You can find my contact details on my blog. Hope to hear from you.

    Liked by 1 person

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