Greetings good people. I am back like I never left. Only, I did leave. I’ve been in a motivational and emotional valley-funk. It stunk. The area I was currently in smelled like a boundless pit of despair. For the last few weeks, I had not felt like myself. I had not felt like doing anything which would typically fulfill me. I thought I had jumped over the lack of motivation hurdle until fatigue, napping, poor eating habits, confusion, and negativity blew the whistle during my race. Then, I realized, I was off my game because I had not been adhering to a spiritual practice.
Practice: noun|repeated exercise in or performance of an activity or skill so as to acquire or maintain proficiency in it.
I’ll be completely honest: I had been warned this would happen. I went to visit my Tarot card reader about 6 months ago. We discussed my plans and the messages the universe had for me. Yes, abundance was on the way. Yes, the cards agreed with all that I envision for myself, but there was a warning. “The universe agrees with all that you are persuing, but if you don’t commit to your spiritual practice, you will become the devil in your own life.” The ironic aspect of his statement came from the fact I had a interesting dream about snakes a few days before that day. I was fighting them, but I digress. My tarot card reader was completely right. 2017 began beautifully. Opportunities were knocking and I’m wasn’t stopping. My showcase went well, gigs are lining up, and content is pouring from my pen like water. All was well. Then, I hit a mental and spiritual block. Self-doubt caught up to me. Poems stopped being written. Life got redundant. My mind was becoming clouded with unnecessary thoughts. Motivation was no longer a part of me. Negativity rained down like my lawn was due for a flood meant to wipe everyone and everything off earth in an effort to ensure a fresh start. Literally a week ago I was reminded of why my life was getting out of order. The message was simple. I stopped spending time with God. I stopped frequenting church. I stopped meditating. I stopped pouring libations and honoring the ancestors. I stopped writing, and I stopped praying with passion.
Break it down, B:
Life is so good though ya’ll, and so is God. Let me tell you why. Last weekend a few friends and myself met up to discuss an upcoming project. Yet, the first few hours of our meeting ended up being an in-depth discussion about God. One of my friends said, “it seems like I’ll start having a good relationship with God. I’m reading the bible. I’m praying. I’ll start to see changes in my life. Then, I stop praying as often and reading as often. My life falls apart, and I have to get back right.” I’m thinking: all facts. How often do we commit to God and/or our spiritual practice, things go well; then, we forget how we got to that good place in the first place, so we stop practicing? I was guilty in this last season. Life was going so well, I unconsciously let go of the spiritual practice that kept me balanced and yielded abundance. It did not take long for me to realize my life was about to veer off course because I had started treating God like a side-piece.
Yet, life is so good though ya’ll, and so is God. I was pushed to attend church the following Sunday after I heard depression knocking at my door. I had to pull myself out of my temporary pit by going to see the water–which allows me to feel God’s presence. The weekend after I had to go spend time in nature by hiking and meditating in the woods. I had to pick my bible back up. I had to begin honoring the ancestors again. Most importantly, I had to pick my pen back up to allow my clouded mind to be defogged. Sure enough, the moment I began to open my life and my attention to the creator, my spirit, mind, and motivation became renewed. Why is that you ask? Well, as humans, there is not much we can do outside of the power of the creator, so when we keep God first, life becomes easier.
The best thing about the most high is there is always room for improvement. We always have the opportunity to right our wrongs with every new breath we receive. (Job 32:8) We need not to have shame. We need only to have a new level of dedication and passion for that which will always sustain us: a spiritual practice.
- The universe will redirect us when we are out of place.
- Practice makes perfect.
- Spiritual practices require discipline and consistency.
‘Thank you’ is the best prayer that anyone could say. I say that one a lot. Thank you expresses extreme gratitude, humility, understanding.
Be light. Work your talents. Together we can spark a light pandemic.
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& Thank you so much for reading
Britney “Bird Nefertiti” Newton